The World Used to Be Square!
Rivki D. Rosenwald Esq., CLC, SDS
In a previous article I wrote things can be done differently in a relationship. And someone wrote in tell me, how?
Well I’m glad you’re listening! And I’m glad you’re asking?
So, here’s some insights.
It starts with believing. And wanting things to be different.
The problem is, when you want things to be different -You usually try to change the people around you. Why not? It seems so much simpler. And it is! For you!
You figure it just takes talking, or lecturing, or hocking; and no other effort on your part is necessary. Yippee!
However, what about the other person?
They don’t feel like being changed by you. They feel like you should change!
Each person who wants change, wants it from the other party. And that’s no party!
So, you need to realize you need to put in effort too. You don’t necessarily need to be the only one making the effort. It could be a joint effort.
But people often needs guidance to get there.
Why?
Because, we are all stuck in our own way of seeing things!
When you get re-educated or see things from another vantage point, you start to know that there is something other than your original view.
Remember when everyone thought the world was square and that people would fall off if they went too far. Well now, everyone thinks it’s round and that they’ll keep going round and round if they keep going. And the funny thing is people do- with the same way of looking at things!
But someone did illuminate for us all to see the world in a different way. There is another way to see things, and when you do it, you change automatically.
You can think someone is nasty. And you may treat them rudely. But, if you find out they just heard some bad news, you change toward them.
When you can see the other person’ s side differently, you can start to come at them in a different way. And the same is true in reverse as well.
First, we must want to see them another way. We need to be curious about that other way. When we find out more, or learn something new, we are more prone to change ourselves with an ease and fluidity.
It’s each person’s prerogative to be open to seeing another in their deeper dimension. If they do, they can feel differently about them. If they don’t, like the world, they can continue to go round and round with the same frustrations.
If you need new perspectives, on how to get there, I’m glad to open your eyes to how to find them. Since, if you couldn’t do it till now – I’m sad to say, no quick article can get you there. But it could be your start……
Rivki Rosenwald is a certified relationship counselor, and career and life coach. She can be contacted at 917-705-2004 or rivki@rosenwalds.com