Love Sickness
Rivki D. Rosenwald Esq., LMFT, CLC, SDS
There are certain hot topics these days. Some are discussed a lot, some are over discussed and some are better avoided:
Florida,
Corona,
Politics!
So hey, what about moving to some old topics instead.
Like dating?!
It’s definitely more challenging these days.
Where exactly should people meet?!
And if they do happen to meet or get fixed up, or miraculously both say yes on some website – How does it play out?
So, let’s say that you agree to a date:
Where can you go?
And how do you get there?
Does she have to sit in the car trunk– social distancing after all!
Or is it better to Meet by Uber?
But. Why?
Are you safer being exposed to a different stranger?!
What about going out to eat?
Good idea!
Iffy execution!
Are they open?
If so, can you get a reservation for the two tables they have available.
And is it so deserted there that for some it would be yeeychud?
How about playing pool?
Again, good idea, but where?
Last year people’s porches were the dating hot spot. If one had a pretty outside area that they were willing to share, people used it for a romantic little dates.
But, winter isn’t offering those same amenities.
I’ve got to be honest. I have a pool table that is kind of located in an out of the way area of the house. It has become the hottest dating spot.
The truth is that making it available has really cramped my style. Wait a minute- No, I’m not some big pool shark. But I use it much more than you’d think. After all, could you think of a more perfect laundry folding surface?! But, what we won’t do for love?!
Anyway, I’m still not exactly going that many places. So, who is there to notice if I’m wearing clean clothes anyway?!
Clearly, thinking of places to go these days is just more challenging. People have had to become more creative and resourceful to figure out how to spend time together. Some are so resourceful though, that to avoid all that anxiety, they are just proposing sooner!
That kind of really helps things. Because, they get much busier planning a quick wedding and thereby don’t need to plan dates.
Unless, they actually want people to attend their wedding!!!
In which case, they are putting it off till the summer, hoping people might actually start responding yes, even if they are not family.
But, either way, the stress of creative dates is diminished. They can now just drive around meeting each other’s relatives either through an open doorway, or a slightly ajar window or in extreme cases – a mail slot. It all depends on what stage of the vaccination process the people are up to.
The good news is- I’ve been reading that commitment is up. People are tired of playing the field. Well obviously, there is no field! People are lonely. There aren’t really that many places to bump into people and just hang out.
So maybe this is the moment to capitalize on it. Think of a guy or girl you know. Ask them about people they know. Make an extra call. Make something happen. You don’t have to have the answer just start an idea in someone’s head and maybe it will just cause a ripple effect.
We’ve seen the power of the invisible flow this year. Let’s see if we can start another type of flow going. One that leads to good outcomes! One that leads to healthy connections! One then leads to relaxed breathing- either for 2 soulmates or at least their parents who worry too much over this.
When it comes to love and connection, we can only create opportunity …. Some may catch the fever, and some may revert back to keeping their former social distance. Some may get chills all over and some may feel nothing. Some may lose taste for the person and some may continue to feel great after being together.
The bottom line is the worst it can cause is love sickness.
