Me and My Phone
Rivki D. Rosenwald Esq., LMFT, CLC, SDS
Everyone worries about social media influencing us badly.
Too much exposure to too many issues that can be problematic. For young people, often the lack of censorship. For older kids, the obsession with FOMO or the challenge of being exposed to other people that make their experiences feel insignificant.
But, does anyone ever worry about the fact that every bit of our lives are now consolidated into these tiny, hand held, apparatuses?
Is anyone concerned that if you forget a password, you are locked out of your life?!!!
Or, that all your information, including, cherished pictures, your financial info, etc. are floating around in a ‘cloud’?!
Honestly, I don’t like being up in the clouds when I’m on an airplane, even for just a few hours. So, Imagine, having to retrieve all my information from the clouds. The turbulence alone might keep me pinned there for the duration.
Hey- did you ever think about this?
Clouds always seem unclear and elusive. Should we assume that Apple cunningly built in a disclaimer by calling their information storage system “I cloud”.
Wouldn’t it seem that depending on a cloud just doesn’t seem to hold water?!
Then sometimes, I can’t locate my phone. Does that ever happen to you?
-Isn’t there this sudden terrible feeling of being completely lost?! Yet doesn’t that seem absolutely ridiculous, when you are exactly where you were a minute ago?!!!!
Sometimes, I dictate a text message.
-And then when I read it back not only does it have no resemblance to what I said, it doesn’t even sound like any language I’m even familiar with. Oh, and then, of course, inadvertently I hit send!
But rather than simply explaining what occurred to the recipient of my message, I try the old “my dog ate my homework” approach- You know “woops sorry, my little kid got hold of my phone”!
Afterwards, I resend a more coherent message – which takes me another half hour to get perfectly right. Since, the phone has its own opinion about how things should come out and keeps putting in its own 2 cents. In that time l, I could have driven over to your house and spoken to you directly!
And how about these group texts?
Suddenly everyone and they’re uncle is in your living room. And you just wanted an intimate little conversation.
Or what about what’s ap chats?
If you don’t stay right up on them – You have to travel back at least a mile to discover what everyone is commenting on.
Who has the time?! Yet, if you don’t- you remain lost in the twilight zone.
My worst experience is that I seem
to send out a dozen obituaries a day!!! I’m forever writing ‘dies’ when I mean to write ‘does’.
My phone is far from my best friend. I’d say it’s more like my best enemy. Can’t live with it. Can’t live without it.
I still happen to keep a house phone. Though, I’m not sure why? Nobody uses it except some random solicitors and my family to find me once in a blue moon. Oh and yes, me, to track down my cell phone.
But I like to see my house phone and remember a phone can be just that – a phone and nothing more. Because, using it as a calendar, phonebook, ‘to do’ pad, filing system, alarm clock, camera, fit bit, encyclopedia, stereo, TV, tape recorder. Etc.- is just too much power to give to one device.
Especially, since that device has the potential to elude me on a pretty regular basis.
Last week, I couldn’t find that little power hoarder aka my cell phone. So I grabbed my house phone. I tried to shove it in my pocket and run through the door. Well, suddenly it ricocheted me back since it’s
connected to the wall. I flew back through the door, fell on the floor, smashed my head, bruised my whole left side and I still felt more powerful with it than my cell phone. Because, I realized, with comfort, it could only mess me up physically.
Yes, me and my phone!
Another one of life’s great dilemmas and compromises.
Rivki Rosenwald is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist working with both couples and individuals.
She is a Certified Relationship Counselor. She is a Co-Founder & Creator of an effective Parent Management of Adolescent Years Program. She can be contacted at 917-705-2004 or rivkirosenwald@gmail.com
