Slovie: 10 Ways to Instantly Improve Your Relationship

10 Ways to Instantly Improve Your Relationship

June 26, 2023

5 min read

Practice these habits daily and reignite the spark in your marriage.

Even the best relationships can fall into a boring routine. You start taking one another for granted. You get caught up in work or life pressures. You lose connection.

Here are 10 ways to boost your relationship instantly. Practice these habits daily and you’ll discover that the spark is still there – it just needed to be reignited.

1. Greet your spouse warmly

When you see your partner first thing in the morning or after a day’s work, your greeting can make all the difference. Instead of simply giving a mumbled grunt or instructions, try a warm acknowledgment. Before your spouse leaves out the door, wish him or her success and a wonderful day.

Your words show that you care. Even if you’re undergoing pressure at work or stress with the kids, your relationship is standing on a foundation of tenderness and good feeling.

2. Laugh

Don’t allow a day to go by without at least one moment of laughter. Life is serious enough. Why get weighed down and make your time together seem grim? Laughter uplifts us. Reminisce about times that you remember with fondness. Recall a funny happening. Talk about moments that brought you joy. Put on music that takes you back to a happy place you’ve shared.

Be spontaneous. Try something new together that you’ve never experienced before. It does not have to be expensive or far away. Be proactive. Surprise your partner. A home without laughter is a place filled with darkness. Let the light shine in.

3. Ask: What can I do for you?

To reignite love, invest and give to your spouse. Instead of thinking, What did my partner do for me lately? ask your spouse as you’re returning home, “Is there anything I can pick up for you? Is there anything you need?”

This seemingly small gesture keeps you bonded. Thoughtfulness brings you to a place of sensitivity and love.

4. Be in touch just because

Instead of texting because you have a problem or need something, reach out just because you love your spouse.

Taking time out of a busy day not because you want something, but because “I want you,” shows your partner that you cherish your relationship. You’re connected. You’re not simply coupled by problems or to do lists. You communicate because you enjoy each other’s company. When you have a long day, hearing from the person you love most in the world makes you feel safe.

5. Say thank you

Gratitude is the oxygen of marriage. Couples often feel as if their acts of service go unnoticed. Even the easiest task becomes a burden when there is a lack of gratefulness. People often express greater appreciation to strangers than the people who are sitting across from them at the breakfast table. You begin to expect, grow entitled and stop seeing all the good.

Don’t allow a day to go by without saying thank you to your partner – even if this is what your partner is supposed to be doing.

6. Give a compliment

Everyone loves a compliment. When you say, “Wow, you really worked hard on this” or “I love the way you handled that issue” you are showing your partner that you take notice. Look for a moment to build connection through seeing your spouse through a positive eye.

7. Be affectionate

With the busyness that life brings we forget to be affectionate. One of the blessings we say under the chuppah is that the couple be ‘rayim ahuvim’ – friends and loving companions. Friendship means that we have kind words, a gentle way, a tender tone, and caring gestures. Affection translates into demonstrating that we care.

8. Smile

An entire day can go by without giving your partner a smile. A smile translates into “I am happy to see you and be with you.” It is one of the easiest ways for us to convey your love. And one of the most missed communications in your daily life.

Judaism teaches that the Hebrew word for face is ‘panim’, literally defined as ‘faces’ in the plural. It is impossible to say one face, even when speaking about only yourself. The reason for this is because your face is never singular, belonging solely to you. Your face belongs to all those who see you. It becomes your responsibility to express happiness and not bring others down through your face, especially your life partner.

9. Groom yourself

Take a moment and put yourself together for your partner. Show that you care. Giving time to your appearance and not falling into unhealthy behaviors and habits demonstrates that you’re not complacent. Your desire to keep the relationship vibrant comes through.

10. Be present

With ever present devices, you can be sitting side by side your spouse but completely disengaged. You look at your screens and miss out on the eye contact that relationships require. Show your partner that you are listening, fully. You’re instantly communicating interest and respect.

Being mindful of your daily gestures that communicate love, care, tenderness, affection and priorities can reignite the spark of love that seems to have grown dormant. Nourish your relationship each day. Celebrate your joy. Life is so much better when we share the moments with those we love.

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