CHOCHMAS NASHIM: WHAT CAN I SAY?
By: Suri Davis
Governor Cuomo is ready to wind down the full quarantine in New York. It appears for now that the worst of the virus in New York has passed. I look at the long list of those who we lost in mere weeks, and I don’t know what to say. Acharei mot hakedoshim, Emor: After the death of the holy words, Emor/tell the people…
I feel like I should say nothing, as in a shiva visit. Stay quiet for fear that either there is nothing one can say at our community’s loss and the loss each family member and friend feels at his or her own individual loss, or for fear that anything I say will be insufficient.
My first instinct is to say Nachamu, Nachamu Ami: Be comforted, be comforted my nation. But I realize that it is G-d who said it to His children, and at a shiva visit, we leave the grieving person with the words, G-d will comfort you, it is a heavy task.
My feelings identify with those of our foremother, Rachel, as quoted by Jeremiah: Kol Beramah Nishmah…Rachel mivakeh al banehah/There is a voice on the horizon, bitter crying, Rachel mourns for her children who are gone. Jeremiah sets forth Rachel’s pain at the loss of her children, as they pass her grave on the way to exile. She prays for them, and beseeches G-d on their behalf. G-d listens to Rachel’s pleas and comforts her by telling her that her children will return. And indeed they did return to the land and built the second temple. Those we lost will return, we believe, when Moshiach comes and there will be a resurrection of the dead.
The Lubavitch Rebbe discusses the three months of redemption, Nissan, Iyar and Sivan. He explains them in the context of one of the verses in Shir Hashirim, one of the Megillas we read on Pesach, and which is customarily recited by many Jews on Friday night.
G-d states: Song of Songs 1:4: 1. Draw me, 2. we will run after you, 3. the King as brought me into His chambers. Draw me is a reference to Nissan, in which the Jews were redeemed. They were on such a low level of purity, mired in quicksand, that to be redeemed, G-d had to draw them out on His own, without the merit of the Jews. That is the month of Nissan. During Passover we eat Matzoh/lechem oni, the bread of affliction and poverty.
In Iyar, the month of the counting of the Omer, the Omer consisted of barley, which was animal fodder, a lowly food as well. We were still in a deep state of impurity, but we had witnessed the miracles of the plagues and the crossing of the Red Sea, that we were able to run after G-d and bring Him the offering of the Omer, albeit still in a lowly state. We ran after G-d after seeing all He had done for us, and His providing us with food and sustenance in the desert.
Finally, in Sivan, the month we receive the Torah, we elevated our spirituality and showed our eagerness to G-d, that G-d brought us into His chambers and bestowed upon us the lifetime gift of the Torah, and He wed us for life. On shavuoth, we bring the two beautiful loaves of bread in the Temple. Proud bread, the rich bread, which represents our complete proud relationship with G-d and spirituality.
It is my hope, as we unwind from this situation, that we are comforted by G-d, that He deigns to support us in our desire to get closer to Him, and He restores the crown of David to a rebuilt Jerusalem speedily in our day, and fulfills the words of His prophet “As a man is comforted by His mother, so too will I G-d comfort you, and in Jerusalem will you be comforted.”
-Shabbat shalom.
Suri