CHOCHMAS NASHIM: VAYIKRA: GRATITUDE AND FORGIVENESS
By: Suri Davis
We start with Leviticus/Vayikra this week which discusses the sacrifices in the Tabernacle and Temple. There are sacrifices which are each person’s desire to thank G-d for his bounty, show gratitude, and the details of these sacrifices are written before the details of the sacrifices which are mandatory, e.g., when one sins.
I was thinking of the juxtaposition of gratitude and forgiveness and feel truly that one of the greatest gifts that G-d gave us and for which He role modeled for us, was forgiveness, as revealed in the very beginning of the Torah with Adam and Eve. This juxtaposition appears to me as if to say that if we are grateful to G-d for what we have and bring sacrifices of gratitude, we could avoid the necessity of bringing sacrifices for having sinned.
G-d said to Adam, look at the entire world that I have placed at your disposal, name every item, call it your own name, take dominion over it and enjoy it. There is only one prohibition, eating from the tree of knowledge, for on the day that you eat from the tree of knowledge, you will die. Very powerful, very simple. You have it all but one thing.
As an aside, where do we learn about having it all, but one thing…Haman. Every subject of the king in 127 provinces of Shushan bowed to Haman, but one, Mordechai. All that was given to Haman as second to the king meant nothing to him, says the Megillah, as long as one person, Mordechai, would not bow down to him, and for that one person, the entire Jewish population had to be put to death.
Haman did not have gratitude for all that he had. He wanted it all. But for that one person, he would have had it all, because he was ungrateful, he and his ten sons were put to death.
Adam had it all but one thing. Instead of having gratitude for it all, he ate from the tree of knowledge. According to G-d’s admonition, Adam was to have been put to death, G-d then created forgiveness, from the attribute of judgment with which G-d created the world, He created mercy and the ability to forgive.
There are some “ideas” floating around the world, where people are feeling challenged and they say “it’s all good,” as a mantra, to stop others from going into their Emunah shpiel. Another is something to the effect “that if you hurt me once, that’s your bad, if I let you hurt me again, that’s my bad.” In other words you are one and done. I disagree with this attitude. If you have a nice history with someone and he/she hurts you, then discuss it and resolve it. If you can’t resolve, think maybe he was having a tough day, think that maybe the person doesn’t have the same emotional quotient or intelligence quotient as you, or that he/she is just doing the best that he/she can at the moment. I would never want someone to judge me about one incident when we have a history, is that what we want from G-d, and is that what G-d has role modeled for us?
If you talked with the person or reached out and the person doesn’t want to resolve the situation, then what he is saying is the reason for the fallout, is just an excuse to break it off. If G-d had said to Adam, I told you that on the day you eat from the tree of knowledge you will die, so now I am going to kill you, He would have been technically correct in following up on His threats, but that would have revealed that, as the Torah later states, G-d regretted even creating man. Instead, G-d found a way to make His interaction with man work, by morphing from judgment to mercy. We all make decisions as to whether relationships are worth it. We can make it work, or cut off a relationship we feel is consistently toxic. In my mind, one is done is not fair to anyone, unless you are looking for reasons to break a relationship off.
The torah painstakingly discusses sacrifices as it does the building and workings of the Tabernacle and Temple, to let us know how important our interaction is with G-d, to express our gratitude and when our gratitude fails, and we sin, that we thank G-d for permitting us to ask forgiveness for our lack of gratitude for His beneficence.
We appreciate this most on Yom Kippur. On the eve of Yom Kippur, we recite Kaparos, some with a chicken and others with charity. We acknowledge to G-d that we sinned and that as a result of our sin, we were supposed to perhaps die. We ask, instead, that the chicken be placed to death in our stead, or that our charity, which ameliorates the decree of death, be accepted instead.
Gratitude and forgiveness, gratitude for forgiveness.
Have a good Shabbos.
-Suri