Rivki: I’m Wearing Mine, Are You Wearing Yours?

I’m Wearing Mine Are You Wearing Yours?!

Rivki D. Rosenwald Esq., LMFT, CLC, SDS

Believe  it or not -when I was a kid  no one wore bike helmets! 

Wait, I take that back. Rough and tough “ride on the  road” Motorcyclists did!  But, they were truly part of the real traffic flow so that made sense to us. 

Then again, they looked so tough we thought even the road would be afraid to hurt them. Made  you wonder why they actually needed  protection?! 

Still -Back then no respectable two-wheel riding  cyclist would ever think they needed a helmet!  It just wasn’t on anyone’s radar….

Until someone figured out that the head housed the brain, even when riding a non-motorized bicycle. 

However -When they first started requiring it-people  were like – no way. It was just not something anyone was use to. Then eventually it slowly  caught on…..

And -then they started pushing it for skiers too -I mean seriously, that was a tough sell–  half the pizazz of skiing was your outfit and a big part of the outfit was your hat!

It was  a difficult  adjustment to switch to a helmet  but we got there. 

Today, everyone recognizes it’s a better idea to wear helmets…  

Well at least every parent  does!!! 

Though, You still see kids, riding, rip sticking,  or roller blading without one. And every parent,  kind of wants to run over to  them and wrap something protective around their heads. 

 

But, kids think differently. Their not opting to wear it comes from the security and naïveté of youth. 

They just seem to feel IMMORTAL …. 

And that is  kind of funny, because that’s just when every parent feels like KILLING them! 

A person actually knows they’ve transitioned to  being a parent, when all the bravado they had as a kid, turns into anxiety and neurosis as a parent. 

One minute you’re the wild and crazy, irresponsible adolescent and the next minute, you’re the one  controlling all the behaviors of someone  else! 

It seems that kids  just force you to grow up in so many ways. 

And then  it gets even more complex  cause then the kids start controlling the adult’s  behaviors. 

One of the most disturbing turning points is when kids start curtailing their parent’s actions -which comes with that famous line usually delivered by a maturing youth- “stop behaving that way, you’re embarrassing me”. 

Suddenly, you are under their microscope and they are deciding what’s appropriate for you!  When that happens, you know you can’t just be who you want to be anymore when they are around. 

They have an image of what adultlike behavior is and suddenly your spontaneity is no longer in your  domain. There is a youth committee out on what’s appropriate behavior for you! 

Here it was – you thought you were teaching them to be appropriate youngsters! And they are, it seems, teaching  you to be appropriate adults! 

Ultimately,  you can say they are starting to make sure you know  the rules of showing up in life safely. In other words, they  arekind of checking that you have your  helmet on. 

And not just whether it’s on –  but if it’s on the way they think is right ?!

So –Hats  off to parents and hats off to kids. 

Rivki Rosenwald is a certified relationship counselor, and career and life coach. She can be contacted at 917-705-2004 or rivkirosenwald@gmail.com

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